Release me and let me fly

I cried out my dreams when I was young

I had no worries where it’s going to end

I used to hug my mom and tell her that

I will surely kiss her in my graduation hat.

The aspirations were high and the energy to wait

I was ready to write my own fate

I wanted to write the world’s beauty with my hands

Becoming a writer was my future plan

Used to read and write all stuff I felt

Be it my future or the situations I dealt

My friends used to read and hit like

I considered it a victory of my own type

Started growing up and living up my passion

But passion is never enough for sufficient ration

The creative hands were now typing the resume

It was my need, or my family’s whatever you presume

I thought the world was quite facile

But corporate is never happy or juvenile

Wanted to earn money though corporate

Never know being fake was its trait

The hands which were paused to think

Were given a keyboard instead of ink

I was told to work fast because there is no space for slow

Fake smiles, relations and concern make you grow

I still gathered all my hard work to satisfy them

I abandoned my writing and made endless attempts

I was trying to be the part of the hard workers row

I was called and told that I was very slow

I gave a break to my passion at one instance

But giving them all I had made no sense

I was broken and questioned my conscience

My confidence was shattered at every expense

My will cried out loud and was begging to be free

It doesn’t wanted to be leaf of this corporate tree

Where people are never judged on what they are

But on the flattery they have done so far

It might me the way things work here

But all I expected is a little care

For my hard work and sacrifice

Never saying “no” and being wise

Now I m going to open my wings and fly

I won’t lament for my past and cry

Because corporate made me learn

Every time reward is not what you earn

I will throw the keyboard and hold the pen again

Abandoning all my monetary gains

I will write the every emotion of this human life

Lets make an effort to understand

This is for every boyfriend,brother and father who compromises all their happiness....

Money is driving us haywire. People can survive without oxygen but money. I was noticing a man in my office who came  one hour early to work and was happily doing overtime without even manager asking him to do so.I always used to pity on him and mock at his commitment which I found unnecessary and just a mere show off.

One day I just felt an urge to ask him the reason of his dull and mundane life which starts at office and ends at the footsteps of our office building. I asked him, “Why do you work so much?” he smiled and just avoided my question as joke.

I took away his hands from the keyboard and asked him that when was the last time he has surprised his wife by going home early. Has he seen his daughter saying “papa” for the first time.

He carried a very faint smile on his face and answered me-“I have to pay my half salary every month to see my daughter going to a good school. This overtime never pleases me or I am a workaholic but the money from overtime allows me to take my wife out for a dinner once in a five star hotel every month. My presence turns boring if I don’t add any extra efforts to make my family feel special. Every family member expects monetary gifts from the earning member of the house. My presence is not that special when I am sans surprises or a something special. I work hard to meet my family’s expectation. I too feel like sitting like you in a group and chat.”

I was not agitated or shocked listening to his reply but was spell bound. His reply was so heart touching that it bought back those memories when my dad used to come late from office and daily I used to search gifts in his bag. I was never bothered to ask why he was late or how he managed to get gifts so often. I had tears in my eyes and I just walked away. We get upset when our dad scolds us for  silly reasons like keeping the tap on and forgetting it or leaving the ac switched on even while leaving the house for tuitions. We feel how it matters if air conditioner is switched for an hour more. The truth is that he works his guts out to earn the money to pay all the bills of our house.

We complain our husband for not taking us out for a holiday like our friends husband do. We never realize that how hurt he gets in failing to keep us happy even after getting abused badly by his boss and working late night when we are quietly inside the cozy blanket .He also feels like throwing a resignation and  taking a break from his boring job. He can never do so because he has a bucket list to fulfill. In that list the only wish he has is that he wants to keep his family happy. They don’t share because we never try to understand.

Just hold their hands and thank them for every inch of hard work they have done to fulfill our dreams. Instead of making wishes let’s just spend a day with him without any expectations. Let’s share that burden equally.

First crush is true

It’s for everyone who had a intense teenage crush on someone and for the one who lied that they never  were immature enough to fall for a petty thing called “First crush”

The heat inside the blanket during summers is killing but we find it the soothing like the warmth of a bonfire during winters if we are on phone with our “first crush”. Talking all stuff and breathing heavily out of love which overflows our heart. We are unable to hear our mother’s voice when she is calling our name at the top of her voice but while talking to our “darling” even a slight murmur is crystal clear. Waiting for hours outside her coaching classes just to say hi .You sing you dance and you do everything you have never imagined of doing. You start believing that it’s the joy of true love. We are ready to prove it to the whole world if someone even tries to question the intensity of our feeling.

Sometimes it’s mutual but the one sided crush is more fun and risky. We keep imagining and loving the person in our mind. We always make our mind to say hello but the moment we see our “angel” coming we hide and just admire his/her beauty. For just one glance we wait for hours in balcony holding the book pretending to study. The pain starts excruciating in our heart when we see our “sweetie pie” smiling and talking over phone. We are full of doubts that if “our first love” is already committed. We start feeling as if all hopes to live are pulling apart and we are just standing and welcoming death with open hands. But, the moment our “true love” looks at us all of our doubts suddenly vanish away like a ghost. We gather that amount of details of our Darling that we can write an encyclopedia of her behavior and choices. We feel like crying if we are not made her/his partner in dance.

We cant sleep at nights just waiting for morning to see our sweet first love in school. Sometimes this first crush crosses all social boundaries. Yes, I am talking about having crush on our cute elder cousin or any hot subject teacher. We have goose bumps when our cute elder cousin calls us and kisses our cheek out of healthy love or our hot subject teacher holds our hands and helps us making a diagram. So, this first crush is not a small lake of feelings it is an ocean with diverse waves of emotions and feelings. A crush is often akin to a real relationship and her first experiences with romantic love. Now when we think about it we laugh at our stupidity but only if we notice that was the time our brain was immature but our heart knew to love truly. There was no place for mixed feelings or confusion about the person.

So, we should learn from it that growing up by intellect is good but growing up by soul changes our personality completely. That is the reason we don’t feel the same for anyone with the same intensity. The feeling at that time was not the childish but it was the purity of our heart which later gets amalgamated with diverse impure elements. No feeling which was intense was stupid because it made us stronger in a long run and made us learn about the variety of human emotions.

Hence, never ever mock at your first crush, you were a kid by intellect but very pure lover by heart…..

Slow is beautiful

Nature has its own philosophy. It makes us understand how slowly and gradually things work here. For instance, a piece of stone takes thousand years to transform into soil. A bud takes its own sweet time to blossom into a beautiful flower.

So, even nature teaches us to be patient and slow with every relation of our life. Imagine we try to open the petals of the bud and  blossom it into a flower. The results will be ugly and incomplete and it will lose its beauty completely. Similarly we get attached to a person and start getting  scared to lose that person .So we start trying to make that relation a legal contract. But why are we so unsecured? We can always enjoy the present without any fear of losing the charm. Getting married in a hurry would never create an unbreakable wow between the couple. It just turns into a legal bonding.

Marriage is exactly like a flower which blossoms with time and nature’s fresh air and water. So hurrying up will just ruin its natural way of growing beautiful and strong.

“Love is never a relationship love is relating”-Osho

Let’s know each other and keep our relation as fresh as it was in starting stages. Slowly and gradually the colors of love and trust will start melting and mixing to create the true and perfect picture of  an ideal relation.

 We are in hurry because to relate is insecure and relationship is security. But what is the meaning of security alone which never makes you feel protected and loved. We become so afraid that we want to make it certain and predictable. 

Relation is just a noun and relating is verb. So, let’s reduce each noun to verb.

abandon compromising start believing

We all are made up with the some wishes and aspirations dwelling in our heart. Travelling through time we realize that our fantasies have no role over our aspirations. My middle name is fantasy. While I am walking down the street I always wish of seeing a bunny hiding in the bushes and gestures me to follow him to a wonderland where my prince is waiting for me.

I might have exaggerated a bit but every so called “practical girl” still believes that her prince is going to come and sweep her off her feet, may be not in a white horse but a Mercedes or a fancy bike. Somewhere in every woman’s heart those fairy tales are buried. Encountering the betrayal in relationships and having brutal experience with life every woman just switches off her side which is extremely dreamy and fairytale like.

I am very sure that ever strong and independent woman would be smiling reading it because she still believes in soul mates. Even after getting whipped by the harsh strokes of society’s practical whip, she remains Cinderella from inside.

Some or other time we all sing “you will be the prince and I will be the princess, it’s a love story baby just say yes.”

We have turned into a angel who is hiding her wings to conceal her reality but all I want is that all of us should open our wings and fly with our imaginations. World is not such a bad place to live in and there are people who can live up to your dreams. So, we never have to compromise with our silly dreams because they are not silly but the reason of your happiness and define the purity of our heart.

We get ready daily in a hope that may be somewhere someone is waiting. We just kiss good bye to our aspirations and dreams because we think it’s useless. Let us not change ourselves instead have a little faith on our choices because there are some good people around.

JUST A LITTLE ATTENTION PLEASE!!!

Have I left the geyser open? Did she take her project file with her? I hope he has breakfast and reached office safely.

All the questions from a geyser to  husband’s breakfast keep whirling in her mind when she realizes that there are  hundred  more questions she is accountable to her manage regarding work. Life of a working woman is equivalent to an ant which tries to carry a huge lump of bread far bigger than her size and struggles to climb the wall to reach her home.

She works for her independent life and contributes to her family income. This is the only side we look at. But, the fact is that she is still the house wife .She still irons her kid’s uniform before she goes to bed. She still gets up at 5:00 am and prepares lunchbox for her kid and husband. In addition to that bed tea to her mother and father in law in time. Different variety of breakfast is another story.

Being related to her as a kid, husband or her in laws, have we ever realized that who is there to pack her lunch or help her to make her office presentation. The answer is so obvious that we never look into the matter. May be we have a feeling that she has supernatural powers given to her by some genie or WE JUST DON’T BOTHER? I guess the second answer is a bit rude but true. I wrote this because I have seen or rather observed house wives turning to working woman but still they remain house wife. I don’t say that she should not work at all and go to parties. I just want to say that we can lower down our expectations. Expectations as in if she prepares something very simple for lunch you can always eat it without complaining how awful it was. Sometimes you can just pick her from her workplace and take her out for a dinner.

Working like anything at home and then meeting manager’s expectations is not a piece of a cake. I salute all working woman for their hard work and the fantastic balance they make between her household works. Lets hold her hand and say thanks to let go her freedom and personal fun just to meet up to your daily expectations. While approving a payment in office she pays all the bills on time. Doesn't she deserve recognition?

This is for all women working and managing their household flawlessly.

Join hands instead of holding hands helplessly

Girls wake up!!We are in 21st century.Gone are the days when guys are not supposed to ask our age.When we claim to be equal in every aspect then on what grounds are we expecting a special treatment at every part of our daily life.If a guy is generous enough to offer us his seat in a bus,acknowledge his generosity rather than considering it your moral right.
"Gender differentiation was commenced by our ancestors
 but now we are continuing it my lovely sisters."
If we boast about being equal in every aspect to males then lets not consider ourselves as some fragile flower.Lets be the stem so that we can equally support in the development of this environment which considers us weak.If we take an example of a very normal love relationship,in that too, girl always wants to feel special.She wants a guy to make her feel special on a date which he has to sponsor without a doubt.Why not the other way round?We can take an initiative to make a guy feel special.Lets expand our horizons of mind instead of expanding our image as dainty creation of god.
This is for all the girls who wanna marry a rich guy-"The success you wanna marry is not earned by you and anything which you don't earn can either be begged or borrowed."So its better to fulfill our desires on our own.
Why is a guy always expected to pay wherever we go.Why don't we girls realize that he too has got his own expenses the way we have.Rather than being a liability lets be an asset to men.
It was all about the silly expectations we carry from guys.Now lets talk about the illogical myths we have.
Why cant a female visit an holy place while she is suffering from her menstrual cycle.Our mother is the one who tells us about the menstrual cycle we girls get.She never thinks that we are impure or unfit to sleep beside her or hug her.Them how can we imagine god who is the parent of the whole world will discard us.God has created us .He is with us like our soul, we are never impure for him.
Can i see a surprise in the eyes of readers?Cant I mention Menstrual cycle publicly.Lets get practical and comprehend the truth that every student be it a guy or a girl learns about it in a proper way.Its taught to us in biology.Its as normal as giving birth to a baby.We can openly discuss about it and ask for help from our male friends or father while emergencies.
Lets open our eyes and look around that we all are equal.So, join hands together and contribute to the equality we always wanted between the two genders.

PURE HAPPINESS LIES IN THE HEART

This time I decided to celebrate my birthday in a different manner.In a manner which gives happiness to those people who have never seen the face of happiness since they took birth.I planned my visit to an orphanage.Sharing my smile to them can make my heart grow fonder.When I entered that place I found it painted with different colors of joy .  I heard kids crying out "sister,sister!".I saw them running towards me and the most youngest one hugged me.I felt as if I m in the arms of the God.His little arms were holding my thighs tightly and he cuddled himself under my arms.I had goose bumps and a drop of a tear came out of my eye.I had no idea how to control my emotions flowing out.We often get such emotions seeing anything heart capturing but we just ignore it and move on.Once just try to stand still in that moment and feel the warmth of divine love and compassion. I was in a dilemma that whether I should cry or just smile with him. He has no toys to play ,no colorful or funky clothes to wear.But he had that curiosity and love in his eyes which was beyond all worldly pleasures.They all surrounded me and wished me birthday by kissing my cheeks.I was just silently feeling the heaven I was in.It was full of satisfaction and ecstasy.

This feeling was far above the feeling we have in getting all material happiness.We flaunt our  lavish luxuries and attain satisfaction with the mere praise we get.But those kids ,they smile for the single daal and chapati they get,for the broken car they get to play and for the single new cloth they get as a gift from any unknown visitor.I saw them laughing and dancing while  getting just a a single set of stationery . They were happily unwrapping the gifts they got.They were so glad and satisfied with those things which we are very trivial for even a middle class family kid.We just reject a dress saying it does not fits me well.They have never worn more than two new dresses in an year.

We never respect the small bubbles of happiness floating beside us instead we just break them in the search of something big.One day instead of dining in an Five star restaurant just have some street stalls dosa Just get down from your a.c car and get some ice creams for the poor kids working in some place.These are some trivial things which makes others smile and hugs our heart with compassion.

Do not forget try accepting it

You go far from your place, nostalgic memories and remembrance.You are broken and you feel shifting to a new place will start a new journey of life.But never forget that if you do not clean the vessel from inside then  a new dish can never have its original taste.You keep on adding flavors to the new dish but the essence of the old  screwed up dish still remains there.In the same way life goes.Do not pretend to forget because you too know it from your heart that you can never forget things completely, in fact no one can .If you start living with the fact that something bad happened and see how quickly you get used to of that fact.
                                                     People say "move on dude!"because they were never at your side.So just listen to them and do what you feel is gonna make you  move on in your life.Their is nothing wrong in getting boozed up,but the reason behind that should be nothing.You should never drink to lift your mood up.Apparently you land up in a soup of desolation.Common find a permanent solution!Drinking is never the answer to your questions.Its just the better way to forget all the questions you wanted an answer for.Its better to cry over it as much as you can and then rise up like a strong person who knows what happened and what can happen.
Not just walking blindfolded so that you can never see the past.The day you will  uncover your eyes you will find your past standing just in front and ready to defeat you.
                                                    Changing your place ,work station,group of friends and even your mind set will never make you forget.It will just hide things to reveal you the truth in a bigger picture.So,moving on never meant that you can forget things forever,it always meant staying with memories and accepting them as a part of your life so that you can get used to of the adversity.That day you will never be scared of looking back because you will be hugging your past and walking with it like two old buddies.

DONT LOOK AT US

Sitting in a group of 20 guys and commenting at girl passing by.She is alone and terrified and finds very difficult to react or give it back to them.She keeps on thinking  the possible reason for this behavior of Boys towards girls.She shares it with her parents to know the reason behind this.Instead of looking into the matter parents tell her not to travel alone.They restrict her freedom

This is the stage through which almost all of the girls go through.

We keep questioning this behavior and we end up being raped or grounded by our parents.In this scorching heat we cover our body because we have a fear of hungry eyes staring at us.Is this the humanity??

They worship god and ask for all sorts of trivial wishes they have.A moment later if they see a girl they start looking at her from top to bottom and are determined to make her look down to the ground.Is that what makes them a Man?

The fun fact is here that they still expect God to grant their wishes.After insulting and disparaging the god's most nurturing creation they claim themselves to be the most well founded creations of the god.

We cant walk freely on streets because we are scared of gawking faces and staring eyes.We are humans just like these men.I address every male member here who has stared at a girl in a manner which is not permissible by her.I am not only talking about the road side guys.I am questioning those literate and claiming to be from very sound family background men too."Why do you stare at a girl who comes in short clothes to your school ,college or work-place?"She has right to wear anything she wants the way you men do.

Just sit back and think what if you go out in a vest and burmuda shorts and the people in street keep looking at you and start giggling in a group.You guys will be agitated and may be you end up thrashing people who will be staring.

We undergo through this situation daily in our life.

That 's all I can explain.Please stop treating us like aliens.We are just like you.You will know it the day you have daughters.

Start winning , stop cribbing

Its all about finding your happiness.You are blessed to be a human who can express every emotion. Our life is always prone to death.Still we spend 50% of our life crying and cribbing about people who hardly care about our existence.Why should nt we spend that particular time in keeping ourself happy our bringing smile on the face of those unpriviliged people.
Its never bad to drink or kiss any random guy.Its bad to be in your senses and keep crying for not having a boyfriend.Life is not about rules its all about breaking those rules and making mistakes which land you up in a soup.

You should nt be haywire if a guy is contacting you or looking at you.Rather you should go and ask him what he wants.May be is a gem of a person and who just finds you pretty.Getting into a lift full of crowd and then standing without even smiling.Are we all not humans??Atleast we can wish them good morning or is it written somewhere that we cannot wish a stranger.
These are some petty things we ignore thats why we find ourselves alone at the end of the day.Who stops you from making friends?Its only you.You find someone worth talking still you control yourself .For what??That what other person will think.Thats his job ..not yours..your job is to just say "Hi!I think rather than gazing at each other we can talk."Who knows that you will meet that person next time or not.And if you cannot,then you have no right to blame god for your lonely and non happening life.
Niharika

Secret smiles

Come!I will take you the world
Where bikini's are worn,and hair are curled
You wanna know the SECRET HABITS

OF GIRLS??

When guys look at us ,there is a huge happiness inside
But we show-"oh! I am never of this kind!"

When we walk in group we too peep in guy' s shirt
Hair in chest rock! but too much is yuk!!

Some like fair,clean shaved and chocolaty guys
But some rough and who are indulged in fights.

We look at ourselves from every angle in mirror
Looks we give to it are super killer

If the size is too large it spoils the shape
If they are tiny we compare them to grapes..

Seeing are nail paints don't get surprised
We have thousands of more which are highly priced..

When a guy speaks a word ,we judge him at once
That he is a goose or a Hunk.

Moment we see a pretty girl ,we burn from within
How come her skin is glowing and she is thin??

The intensity of our jokes are more than guys
To say something to each other we just have to smile..

If a girl says "I dress up for myself"she is a liar
Because every bomb is useless without a fire..

U guys can never stare at a girl the way we stare
Because here instead of lovers, competitors are cared.

It was a small example of how different our world is..
Still there are so many things i have missed.

restricted freedom

                 Restricted freedom

India is in a position like a half crumpled snake.It is trying to move but hardly drags an inch.Specifically for women here the world is so perplexing.Its just like you are in a worlds worst prison and you are served with fantastic food and clothes.Will you be able to enjoy?I guess the answer is No.We can never enjoy the facilities if the environment is ill fitted.

So,the women in india are given the liberty to study and explore the people and places.But the moment they start exploring and make mistakes they are addressed by different insulting names.Why?Let her make mistakes and learn like guys do.Why does her single mistake counts on her character.Either dont give her freedom at all.But this restricted freedom is of no use.

She also wants to open her arms and shout her spirit out .But the moment she thinks of doing it ,she is scared  of the people who will talk about her.When a girl walks down a street she is stared as if some alien has landed to earth.Not only guys..aunties,uncles all look at her to find something new to gossip about her.Have they ever realised how uncomfortable she feels.?"Girls have freedom to travel wherever she feels like".this is what people say.But when she follows that,she becomes the victim of rapes and eve teasing.So let them enjoy the little freedom they have.

A small poem by me on behalf of the girl who lost her soul...

The terror of my mind is never gone
Thoughts are like menacing storm
Which handcuffs my mind and threatens my heart
"Will my life have a fresh start"?

Like you i was also the soft flower under my mothers palm
They crumpled me badly and killed my charm
I used to shine ,laugh and was satisfied on a whole
But see now!i m lying lifeless coz devils took my soul

I kill them daily in my mind
But next day i find standing them alive.

When i look at these marks on me
"Please call me god"i beg and plee

I was a normal human being of this small world
My only fault is that i took a birth as a gal

Being a normal girl i had extraordinary dreams
Now!to live a normal life is the most wanted dream

At night i keep my eyes open and gaze at the sky
Coz i see evil pictures of their smiling faces when i close my eyes

Being a girl i also loved staring at mirror..
Now when i do that my whole body shivers.

I was never scolded or beaten by my dad
Now my body was humiliated and badly thrashed.

My dad tells me "everything is gonna be well"
But at night he hides in corner and cries like hell

I cant take revenge or fight with those devils
I just pray to god to save girls from this painful evil

Mom!i just want to come to your lap and weep,
Forget my sorrows and go for a endless sleep..

Lets pray for her soul..
Niharika